Why I wrote Destroying Fantasies

Why did I write Destroying Fantasies?

When I first read the original story of Ashley in The Man Next Door, I was appalled. Despite being a feminist, I found that I could not stomach the careless and callous manner in which Ashley indulged in her adulterous affair. She showed almost no remorse and apart from bellyaching about how she was scarred by the whole affair and fallout, she merely reveled in her 'scars'. Her husband, Will, was merely a tool and background for her great fantasies to play out against.

I was appalled not just by the shallowness of the female protagonist but also by the comments that supported her. A strong and empowered female doesn't need to empower herself through the betrayal of another. Nor does she require male reassurance of her attractive qualities through approval (and presumably through an adulterous lover) from male counterparts.  As a feminist, I shuddered to think fellow feminists viewed Ashley's betrayal as empowerment.

Then again. these aren't perfect characters, more so in Ashley's case. She was attracted by the guy in the original and even with what she learns in Destroying Fantasies, I doubt she'll fully see the truth till faced with callous reality. So that session with Jackass was the final part of the disillusionment, the betrayer is betrayed, the act of betrayal is reversed and becomes an assault on the unfaithful wife physically and psychologically.

Betrayal, regardless of the gender of the perpetrator, is never sexy. I set out to write Destroying Fantasies because I needed to give Will a voice. Yes, he isn't a knight in shining armour nor is he an all out hero. He's as broken as they come and shaped by the choices he makes. Hopefully readers will appreciate the flawed male protagonist in my sequel.

Responses to comments on Destroying Fantasies Part 2

So far, I've refrained from actually responding to comments and feedback sent through emails and through the comments section on the story. That is, apart from readers who specifically requested responses via email. I've found from experience that responding to positive or negative comments merely encourage the trolls. I do thank all who took the time to give a considered feedback. As for the haters/doubters - Whatever your intentions, I prefer to give you the benefit of the doubt.


There was, however, one strand of comment that left me wondering just how did that impression come about. Let me be clear about one thing: I do not find infidelity, adultery and cheating sexy or romantic. So there is no chance that I could ever romanticise a situation that contains these elements. Is there anger? Yes. Is that anger romanticised? No. I do not support or endorse violence in any way. I've been on the receiving end of violence so romanticising violence is about as palatable as soggy fries floating in tea.



Revenge fascinates me. The stripping down of Man's layers of civility to basic, raw  emotions is potentially mesmerising - it's what drew me to theatre and the cinema for years! Is the exploration of all these emotions and ideas done in an OTT way in my work? Let me be honest, hell, yes. Though I might never reach the same level as the works and artists I admire, I do not shy away from the darker side of things.



Everyone is entitled to their opinion, fair enough if you don't like my work. I have varied tastes, HEA is fine but I appreciate a touch of the melodramatic (read OTT) that Euripides’s Medea and Zola's Thérèse Raquin provide. And you can only imagine what my reaction to Seneca’s Phaedra is LOL If your reading palette extends beyond pastel cotton candy and cayenne pepper chocolate, try reading my work. it's not easy reading but who knows you may like it!  Here's the link.



Everyone else, venture no further, such reading is not for the faint of heart or short attention spans! 

Princely Erotica Review 3

Title: Royal Baby

Author: Avery Wilde

What made me go huh??: The first meeting and the interlude before the heroine, Keira, becomes a maid in the palace. Keira doesn't recognise slutty royal Prince Andrew. Really? She didn't google her employer?

Storyline in a snap: Art student Keira gets hired as a maid in the royal household. Before she leaves for the UK, (yes, most of these plucky Cinderellas are American because presumably no sane girl of other nationalities would want to be in a royal family LOL) she meets the dirty slutty Prince Andrew (that the story is about the British royal family and the real life Prince Andrew has been implicated in several unsavoury situations and unsuitable company does make one suspicious about the choice of name) who's incognito as Drew Ellis in NY. She's rescued from being a one night stand notch on the belt encounter for said Prince and isn't too happy with him. So after all the banter and knot untwisting that always happens, Keira and Andrew end up having that romp (make that romps) in the hay (one episode is literally a romp in the hayloft, enjoy the witty observation on the porn qualities of hay romps, it's at least a little different!). Now throw in the expected royal pregnancy (see title) plus some typical obstacles, and readers get an enjoyable quick read with HEA.

What puzzled or didn't quite work: Keira's twisting herself into knots. Getting all twisted up in knots for heroines is ok once, twice in quick succession begs the question 'why?'

What I liked: The quirky humour and I don't just mean Andrew's awful sense of humour haha (the royal sceptre joke was probably the most inventive one in his repertoire) but also the episode of she said vs She (crazy Swedish Princess) said incident where the Queen tries to shield royal dumbness from public ridicule by ordering that their pointless argument about witnesses and evidence never be raised again.

Rating: 2.5* 

                                                                    

It was entertaining, just wish it had a bit more pizzazz.

So after reading three royal erotica stories, what's the takeaway? Modern royals are (at least in fiction though the 'ahem' younger members of some European royal houses are proving fiction can be inspired by life) proud heirs of legendary crown jewels and shagging tendencies (anyone remember Jonathan Rhys Meyers as Henry in The Tudors?). But what makes a story a cut above the rest is the humour and Waltz proved the winner (see earlier post for review of Waltz's book) with the OTT humour.

Princely Erotica Review 2

Title: His Princess

Author: Abigail Graham

What made me go huh??: The setting was a little confusing. Alternately modern, neo-medieval, perhaps even a touch of sci-fi.

Storyline in a snap: Penny, an American girl reeling from the death of her fiancé, ends up in a country (Kosztyla) that doesn't have the best of reputations. The Prince, Kristoff, is a tortured soul who rescues her from a bunch of human traffickers abetted by an American CIA operative just before Penny is raped. There's lack of clarity regarding the condition of her companions till the conclusion. Throw in a crazy ex-fiancée for the Prince and there's a bloody struggle in the end which leads to the HEA. Frankly, the bloodshed was the more "innovative" part of the story but didn't really work with the rest of the story.

What didn't work: The bloody conflict which was kind of confusing. The timelines - the conclusion was tacked on almost like an afterthought and there was no warning that the story was jumping from post marital sex to years later.

What I liked: Hot scenes though a little overwrought. Look there's a reason why it's erotica and not fairytale though several of the Grimm brothers' texts aren't exactly politically correct.

Rating: 2*

                                                          

I liked the reference to the Persephone myth but didn't seem like it was pursued further, which was a shame. Maybe the myth cycle didn't quite work out because the Ceres equivalent wasn't really there.

What puzzled in both books: Why are the heroines always haunted by their ex-fiancés? Is it a plot device to assure the reader that modern day Cinderellas aren't just slutty gold diggers? Or is it the angst? Either way, it was just odd that both these stories had that in common. And why are the Princes all Prince Charming (model 7S??) built impossibly large - erm, ok, the crown jewels are big, I get it but a guy with tree trunk-sized limbs?? LOL

I don't like to be too hard on writers simply because I know most do spend a fair amount of time and put at least some effort in their work. So I would say Waltz's book was fun, while Graham could do with a bit more attention to the plot.

Disclosure: I bought both books on Kindle so I'm not sure how this could be construed as anything but a frank review. I've tried to be as unbiased as possible but really it's simple I only want to be entertained!

Princely Erotica Review 1

Never thought I'd read, much less review, erotica that centres on princes but had a friend recommend these reads after a really awful couple of weeks at work and life generally.

Ok, let me start by saying I was surprised by how I enjoyed both reads and I took up the last recommended read from another friend without too much resistance LOL

So to get straight to the heart of the matter:-

Title: Dirty Prince

Author: Vanessa Waltz

What made me go huh??: Anglefell. Not sure if it's a pun on the Anglo-Saxon nation and the fall (from grace) that the nation seems to have gone through. It clearly is good old Britain with all its quirks that seems to be the mold for Anglefell.

Storyline in a snap: Sassy American girl Daisy decides to sneak into Anglefell, a country that is in a state of cold war with the United States. When she's caught, she's accused of being a spy. So manwhore Prince Liam discovers a heart (ie an organ that beats with blood, other than the crown jewels of course haha!), he decides to propose a mutually beneficial alliance in the form of marriage. That starts a series of obstacle courses which the increasingly happy couple must negotiate.

What puzzled or dismayed me : Please see next post, there's something this story shares with the next read which was puzzling.

What I liked: The humour. Waltz has clearly decided to take a step away from the usual crime spiel and the first hint came in the chapter titles which are tabloid headlines. Nice touch. There's a Facebook page associated with the story and I'll pop by soon seeing how intrigued I'm by the idea.

Rating: 3.5*

                                                                    

A prince who speaks with a South London accent? LOL Bring it on!

What A Week

It's been a crazy week and readers should know when I start a post with these words, it's never a harbinger of anything great LOL

Okay, let's start with the bad news. I'm officially a target for trolls and eroticanazis. People have been 1* bombing the stories on Literotica. Not sure if they know they're being tracked BTW. So here's my response: All friends and readers, please read and vote objectively. If it's truly awful, vote it awful. If it's average, vote average. Just don't let the haters who haven't even read the stuff win. Anyone willing to join in the battle, click here!

And yes, the good news, of sorts. My latest story is out. Reception was mixed as usual. The concluding segment will not be posted for at least a month. I'll be working on the conclusion to Original Sin because it's been lagging for a long time and I feel bad towards readers who've supported that storyline. Warning: It's not pretty and rather twisted. So those who are squeamish are advised not to read.

And while we're on the topic, I would like to thank all beta readers, particularly DFWB, who probably did the equivalent of pulling me back from the cliff in terms of the writing.

Enjoy the reads and let me know what you think. I'm gonna indulge in my fave obsession: Food!

Schokolade nuss! Actually that's from Easter, the chocolate I forgot to eat. Hope you guys are enjoying your sweets too!

A Letter to Readers

It's that time of year again when many celebrate and some reflect on the year that's been. It's been quite a year for me. Started writing and publishing in the second quarter of the year. Made a few new friends online. Started a more active  social media presence. And started on genres that I never thought I'd ever dare to touch.

Themes of betrayal have always fascinated me and I guess it shows through the work. I've always liked Alexandre Dumas' work. That was a major driving force behind the effort to learn French, which is still a work in progress, stalled by lack of time and resources. I miss French classes and French cinema! Even the declensions, which drive me up the walls!

Revenge for the betrayal suffered has been a unchanging principle for me perhaps because I've seen betrayal early in life. Some have jokingly attributed that to the horoscope ^^ LOL

Yet I prefer to think of it as an Old Testament thing, you know the part of the bible that provides all the drama and brimstone (plus fodder for Hollywood blockbusters!). Mind you, I like a happily ever after like most but I can't accept one that occurs because one party was hoodwinked or unfairly dealt with. If this offends you, please do not read my recent work. Those not offended by some brimstone, please read on! 

Real life: started a new job earlier this year, contemplating moving as the wanderlust beckons and I'm ready to start looking earnestly.

If circumstances allow, I'll return to the Continent soon and may even go back to school, I know, I know, I'm addicted to the freedom of student life, but hopefully, I'll be in less claustrophobic surroundings, another experience of dreaming spires madness is not quite for me!

Hopefully, there'll be time to breathe in the new year and I'm looking forward to a little break so don't miss me too much!

Hope to post one last story before the year ends - I'm unusually hesitant about the story because it has my guts roiling and I'm afraid what that might cause in my dark/twisted imagination LOL read and find out!


Lastly, here's wishing a really wonderful holiday season to all readers and keep reading and giving feedback! I've donated most of my holiday budget to charity and no cards going out this season I'm afraid but I'm sure you won't mind since a vulnerable individual or family out there will be eating and warmer this season!

Apparently, my Christmas story is out : Have fun! From the comments, the knives are drawn LOL! Maybe I should bring out the turkey hurhurhur!

Taking A Breath

It's been a crazy few weeks and I'm stopping to take stock of everything that's happening.

On the writing side of things, I'm gonna have to ask for some patience as there's a line of stuff to be done and it'll be some time before normal programming returns LOL! I'll still post, just less frequently so keep checking my other blog and outofshadows on Literotica!

On the personal side, think my ex has finally gotten the message after 3 years and I'm getting the last of my part of the investments back. And I just heard from someone I haven't talked to in 5 years and had an invite along the lines of "let's go out hunting since we're irresistible - at least according to our horoscope" So I'm having heels and skirts at the top of my shopping list though I'm still unsure if I wanna go hunting with Ms Self-Destructive. I still remember her as I dragged her into rehab 5 years ago and I remember thinking I was closing an important chapter in our friendship 5 years ago. And though hunting alone sounds daunting, it's gotta be better than getting hit on in real life by a very weird bunch as I'm already hit on in cyber space by nutters such as the one below:

Bear in mind, that was the first conversation I had with the guy and nope, I didn't say anything that could have made him think whatever he thought. My friends saw my replies and laughed loudly asking why I was unfailingly polite with these weirdos. As I've said, I attract the nutters. Had another message from a different person just this evening -sighz, why can't I just attract the nice ones?!

Latest erotica links, Spectre review and music

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The Payback Preview part 2

Been another week of mundane soul-sucking life and while some writers have responded to ,my requests to write follow ups, there have some who have redefined the sound of silence - oh well, life marches on.

The Payback Preview 2

In fact, through chatting with Cindy's colleagues and Ricky's
investigation, he had pretty much nailed down when and where Cindy had
first met Jackson. The summer training camp a year and seven months
back that Cindy had signed on for. It wasn't a school sponsored event
but had been recommended by the teachers association that Cindy
belonged to. Jackson had been the life coach hired by the event
organisers. The irony that Jackson wrought such a huge change in the
lives of his wife and himself was not lost on Steve.

While they went through the preliminaries of introduction and
handshaking, Steve watched Jackson's expression and was sure he noted
a certain glimmer of smug satisfaction in the man's eyes. Was Steve
paranoid? Maybe. Was he tense? Definitely. Not because his motlrtal
enemy was in front of him but rather because he was about to bring a
crucial element into the game. Cindy had been behind him chatting with
the other executives' wives when he gently turned her around and
introduced her to a new service provider who was to run their
corporate training camp this year.

Steve could barely prevent an evil smile as Cindy recognised her
former adulterous lover. Her eyes widened in shock and she turned pale
as Jackson gripped her limp outstretched hand in greeting. Noting that
Jackson had held onto his wife's hand for longer than was appropriate,
Steve cleared his throat and Cindy unfroze, snatching her hand back as
if Jackson had burning coals in his hand.

Coming Soon

If you have no idea what that title refers to, you've missed a most of my posts the last few weeks! A Step Into Darkness Part 3 is coming soon!

Will wrap up The Original Sin alternative story arc in the next few weeks too. Revenge will be visited upon a brotherhood villain - it's violent and definitely not for the fainthearted according to an early reader.

To whet your appetite, think what would happen if a villain is left in a locked room, naked and defenceless among a group of women he abused and assaulted. The guy is toast..

Till the next post: have fun with OR Chp 3 part 2 http://goo.gl/cW8ApL

Post at the end of a crazy week

Been a crazy week ending in an awful cold. Curling up with my favourite kinky reads and continuing to weave the journey into dark desire. Hint: Jamie takes over Victoria's senses after initiating her in Part 1 and signing possession in Part 2

The Original Sin Story arc continues its serialization on http://t.co/M5LiVf0TyM

And while I hate to throw complications in the lovebirds' way but all this will only make it sweeter and hotter later on!

Enjoy the week ahead!

Wine And Erotica

It's Friday! Hope all readers are having a good one. Finally managed to have a glass of wine and relax before the "super" work weekend. Plus crackers with peanut butter. Ok, weird combinations, but it's sparked off a thought about Food Play ~ expect to see that in the works soon!

The serialization continues as well, the violent part is today, so heads up for those who are a little more sensitive. Link is here http://eroftasy.blogspot.sg/2015/04/purgatory.html

Once the serialization of Chapter 1 is done, there'll be a fun contest: the first 3 readers who can point out the paragraphs from the book which are missing from the serialization will get to read the first chapter of part 3 before it's published! Details of that contest will be announced at the end of the serialization.

Have fun this weekend! Preferably ordering and reading a copy of  A Step Into Darkness Part 1 and 2 available in Amazon  , Barnes and Noble , iTunes , Google Play and BookRix . LOL Well, you can't blame me for trying!

Fantasmes Érotiques

Yes! The new blog is up! All previews and serials will be on this new blog. Check out the first post/treat :) 

Hope readers will enjoy waking to a nightmare !

Heat Rising

And it isn't just the weather! Moving on all 3 fronts with short story collection, the contemporary romance plot and A Step Into Darkness.

Just realised that Part 1 and 2 are available through Google Books/Play as well:

For A Step Into Darkness  Part 1, click here 

For A Step Into Darkness  Part 2, click here

Have fun with the samples! Enjoy the heat!

And a link for my secret indulgence: Luis Mario in Gata Salvaje. The drama was a hot mess but it's fun, fun, fun! And no one, I repeat, no one pouts like this guy lol.  youtu.be/dCiyQDA8z-Q

Rape Trope and the Part One controversy

When A Step Into Darkness was first conceptualized, it was not intended to be a bodice ripper, though I’ve read a fair number of them, including some of the more infamous examples, particularly Christine Monson’s Stormfire.

As Part One was released, I braced myself for the backlash though precautionary measures were taken that included reducing the details in the description of the rape of Marguerite, Mary and Cicely by the Brotherhood. That rape scene was intended to show the misogynistic thought processes of male characters such as William Wentworth in the 1700s, where the only desire that counted was that of men. Hence, the exercise of power in terms of desire and sexuality was male-centric, the most extreme example being the Brotherhood, which some astute first readers have realised takes inspiration from the Hellfire clubs of Wharton and Dashwood.

That Marguerite’s son goes on to rape Victoria Wentworth in an act of revenge that ironically echoes his mother’s ordeal is as much revenge trope as it is rape trope. What disturbed readers most was perhaps Victoria’s physical reaction. To clarify, she is not experiencing rape fantasies and the scene is not meant to express that trope either. Rather, it expresses the male view of sex and desire as power over the female. Victoria’s reaction reflects her identity at the time, a young single lady who has been closeted within the confines of social regulations for much of her life, expected, in most circumstances, not to have sexual encounters or experience. The awakening of desire and the journey it takes female protagonist 1 (yes, there is at least one other who does not appear till Book 3) on will be the exploration of desire from the female perspective within a male-centric social structure. That is in essence the direction of the narrative for the series. Hopefully, this resolves most questions and will allow readers to enjoy the books.

A Step Into Darkness is Book One in the Darkest Before Dawn series , which has a total of 5 books.
For readers who would like to have a copy of the books:

A Step Into Darkness Part One is now out on
iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/a-step-into-darkness-part-one/id985919142?mt=11
Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/a-step-into-darkness-part-one-judith-loewe/1121748210?ean=9783736887084&isbn=9783736887084
Amazon Kindle version http://www.amazon.com/Step-Into-Darkness-Part-One-ebook/dp/B00UYFSJ3G

A Step Into Darkness Part Two is also out on
iTunes https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/a-step-into-darkness-part-two/id985105771?mt=11
Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/a-step-into-darkness-part-two-judith-loewe/1121727028?ean=9783736887138&isbn=9783736887138
Amazon http://www.amazon.com/Step-Into-Darkness-Darkest-Before-ebook/dp/B00VMQUIN0/ref=sr_1_5?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1429273605&sr=1-5&keywords=a+step+into+darkness .

Do read and rate! Personal or private responses are welcome as well, email me.

For readers who loved Marguerite and wish to read more about her, please follow The Original Sin series  by outofshadows on Literotica. The offshoot was inspired by reader requests for more of Marguerite’s story arc.

Have a great weekend reading!

Of Hookup Conversations and Book Availability

Attended the Forever Romance Historical Hookup and it was more fun than anticipated! Would have been a lot more fun if silly me hadn't gotten lost on the wrong platform! You can still see snippets of it on the Facebook page for the event and on my Twitter wall @judith_loewe . Many thanks to Forever Romance who hosted the event as well as Lily Dalton and Elizabeth Hoyt who kindly responded!

Thanks to the folks over at BookRix for their patience and help in getting the books out. Here are the links for part 1 on BookRix and iTunes  https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/a-step-into-darkness-part-one/id985919142?mt=11 

Have fun reading!

Am off to download Bumble for some fun!

It's Live!

Yeess!!! Part 2 is out!

Please check it out on:

Barnes and Noble
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/a-step-into-darkness-part-two-judith-loewe/1121727028?ean=9783736887138&isbn=9783736887138

iTunes
https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/a-step-into-darkness-part-two/id985105771?mt=11

Amazon
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00W1738SG/?_encoding=UTF8&tag=boo0d5-20&linkCode=ur2&camp=1789&creative=9325

Leaving you with another snippet before I go do a little dance, no rain but dancing is always fun!

The room was filled with the scent of their lovemaking and the rasps of harsh breaths as they recovered from their wild coupling...

Alternative storyline for Marguerite

Marguerite proved more popular than I had expected, hence, an alternative storyline was created for her that looks beyond the attack. In chapter 2, Marguerite deals with the consequences of the attack and experiences healing with her fiance. The revenge angle will return from chapter 3 onwards and warning: it's not pretty, not by any stretch of the imagination.

Here's the link for the Literotica post :
The Original Sin Ch. 02 https://www.literotica.com/s/the-original-sin-ch-02

One further note before the work week starts proper: Literotica is the only free site online that I post previews or stories on, any other posts on other sites are not mine.

Happy reading!